1/18/2011 I Can DO This! I Can DO This!

Long time readers know that a couple of times a week Bob and I make a beer/Pepsi run. I have been a Pepsi drinker from the time I was a little girl. I’ve even been told that in my toddler years I had Pepsi in my bottle. My mom denies that but I’m not so sure.

When most people get up in the morning they head for the coffee maker or the tea kettle. Not me, I head for the fridge and grab a Pepsi. Throughout the day you will rarely see me without a Pepsi nearby. Except for the occasional ice cold glass of milk with a meal of spaghetti and meatballs, I drink Pepsi. All. The. Time.

I’m not sure if I’ve told this story before or not and if I have, well, you’ll just have to suffer through it.

Back in ‘75 when I went through Basic Training with the U.S. Army I was not allowed to have Pepsi’s. They were a privilege and had to be earned. It was going to take three weeks at least before we were allowed treats like soda. Or so my Drill Sergeant thought. Shortly after boot camp started I had to go on sick call because of blisters on my feet from my very uncomfortable combat boots. It turned out those blisters were an answer from heaven. I had gone to the base hospital, waited in line for my turn, had my blisters treated and padded strips taped to my feet to protect them and was told to put the boots back on and wait for the bus to take me back to my area.

I was on the 4th floor and went to the elevator. I don’t remember exactly what my choices of buttons were but I do recall it was confusing. Did I want “LL” or “ # 1” and I think they might have even had a button labeled ground. Why they didn’t have one labeled, “Snookie push this one” is beyond me. So I pushed and down I went. I was the only one in the elevator and when the car stopped and the doors slid slowly open….they stood there. Four of them. They glowed with a golden light and the trumpeters trumpeted and the angels played their harps and I knew I had arrived in the Promised Land. My own personal utopia!

They hummed in unison. Their compressors doing whatever it is compressors do. Yes, standing before me was four, count em’, four Pepsi machines. I couldn’t even move, I was so taken with my good fortune. I finally stepped forward, fearing that somehow this was all a mirage and in fact I would be standing in front of machines that dispensed Orange Nehi or Grape Nehi or worse yet, Yoo-Hoo’s. They were real and my next thought was, “Oh please, please don’t be sold out, oh please.” I was in luck. I quickly dug into my black, service uniform purse for quarters. Oh, please let there be quarters! Yes! Half a roll. I promptly put a quarter in each machine and pushed the proper button and my beloved Pepsi’s fell out of each machine. I gathered them like a crazed person and sat down in the corner out of sight in case someone came down on the elevator. I sat there and held an ice cold Pepsi up to my cheek. Well, that didn’t last long, after all I had some serious drinking to do! I downed only two of those Pepsi’s because quite frankly I just couldn’t get the last two down. Oh my gosh, I never burped so much! I guess I wasn’t used to the carbonation.

I still had two and had to get them back to my area. I easily put one in my service uniform purse and the other I wrapped in paper towels from the ladies room and slid it inside my waistband of my fatigues. Oh that was cold! I got back to my area and promptly went to my friend that I had made in the days prior. We excused ourselves to female latrine and downed those still pretty cold Pepsi’s.

Lucky for me I had a real problem with blisters and made numerous trips to sick call.

So here I am today and I’ve decided that I need to give up these Pepsi’s. That’s not to say I’ll never drink another one but I’m introducing Crystal Light Iced Tea, Peach flavor to my liquid intake. I drink way too many Pepsi’s and I know it. They can’t be good for me but except for the extra pounds I can’t see where they’ve done me any harm.

I’m going COLD TURKEY! Wish me luck and pray for me. (We’ll see how long this last.